Your essay is quite interesting and informative with a discussion about Very High Temperature Reactor (VHTR), which can be used to replace fossil fuels. Because of a clear thesis statement, I can easily recognize your main points in this essay.
In body paragraphs, there are many relevant and logical reasons used to support your ideas and most of them are logical. These supporting information are very useful; thank to them, I knew more about the positive advantages of VHTR. However, I did not recognize any counterclaim and rebuttal in your essay. So, you should use some counterclaim to strengthen your points of view and persuade readers. In addition, you also should use more transitional words to link all ideas smoothly so that your essay will be clearer. You also did not use any citation. Some citation quoted from articles of famous journals or researchers may make your essay become more persuasive.
Generally, thank to this essay, I knew more about nuclear reactor and this is an useful information. Your writing is quite interesting and if you fix some small mistakes, it could be a good essay.
Wednesday, 31 March 2010
Sunday, 14 March 2010
Blog 4: Summary of "Climate of compromise"
Before Copenhagen summit begin, there are many different perspectives about the success of this conference. Copenhagen summit have partially attained some successes because many countries promise to cut a remarkable amount of emissions and they have already started to consider seriously their own emissions. To encounter the climate change, all nations have to reduce their emissions in a long term. Developed countries must accept to decrease the amount of emission substantially while developing ones must control their greenhouse gases. Moreover, developing countries also have to improve their technology with the help of developed countries. Another trouble which developing countries definitely face is financial concern. An international fund is a solution for this problem and funds should be distributed smoothly and effectively to countries in need. There are a lot of things for countries to do and it is impossible to solve all at a time, but leaders can make strong actions based on national ability. All countries have to be patient to solve this global problem.
Thursday, 25 February 2010
Post no. 2 - Peer Review (Nadzri's WA1)
Your essay is quite brief and straightforward. From this, I have known generally about the important roles of ecosystems in combating climate change.
Your introduction is clear enough to recognize the thesis statement. You focus on how natural ecosystem save lives and livelihoods as well as its benefit to the nature and human.
You also have used many references to develop and support your ideas. However, although your supporting ideas is quite clear and easy to follow, you also need to provide more information for each aspect you emphasized so that readers can imagine it efficiently. For example, in the forth paragraph, you should show how the developing countries can benefit from the REDD.
Moreover, although your essay is quite brief and easy to follow, you should use more transition words so that you essay will be more smooth. For instance, also in forth paragraph. , you want to discuss about the benefit of natural ecosystems which you have reminded in the thesis statement but idea is so general. You need to provide more specific benefits of natural ecosystems.
Lastly, You have summarized well all of your main points in the conclusion. However, at the end of your essays, there are no references which should be listed again for the correction purpose.
In general, your essay is logical and good enough to provide a general picture about the vital roles of natural ecosystems and it's really useful for me to broaden my knowledge about the relationship of natural ecosystems and climate change.
Your introduction is clear enough to recognize the thesis statement. You focus on how natural ecosystem save lives and livelihoods as well as its benefit to the nature and human.
You also have used many references to develop and support your ideas. However, although your supporting ideas is quite clear and easy to follow, you also need to provide more information for each aspect you emphasized so that readers can imagine it efficiently. For example, in the forth paragraph, you should show how the developing countries can benefit from the REDD.
Moreover, although your essay is quite brief and easy to follow, you should use more transition words so that you essay will be more smooth. For instance, also in forth paragraph. , you want to discuss about the benefit of natural ecosystems which you have reminded in the thesis statement but idea is so general. You need to provide more specific benefits of natural ecosystems.
Lastly, You have summarized well all of your main points in the conclusion. However, at the end of your essays, there are no references which should be listed again for the correction purpose.
In general, your essay is logical and good enough to provide a general picture about the vital roles of natural ecosystems and it's really useful for me to broaden my knowledge about the relationship of natural ecosystems and climate change.
Saturday, 23 January 2010
The first post
Hi everyone, I'm Michael and this is my firts post. Firts of all, I will introduce briefly about myself.
Currently, I'm a first-year student of Faculty of engineering, NUS, Singapore. My department is environmental of Engineering. I come from Vietnam which is located in Southeast Asia region.
In this semester at NUS, I study EG1471 module and this is really a good chance for me to improve my academic English in particular and English skills in general. This course is very useful for me because I have an exceptional opportunity to perfect my writing skill, which I'm not really good at. I hope that after finishing this class, my English skills will be enhanced remarkably, especially in writing academic English.
Currently, I'm a first-year student of Faculty of engineering, NUS, Singapore. My department is environmental of Engineering. I come from Vietnam which is located in Southeast Asia region.
In this semester at NUS, I study EG1471 module and this is really a good chance for me to improve my academic English in particular and English skills in general. This course is very useful for me because I have an exceptional opportunity to perfect my writing skill, which I'm not really good at. I hope that after finishing this class, my English skills will be enhanced remarkably, especially in writing academic English.
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